Online dating disclosure shapes whether people pursue casual or committed relationships

A few lines in an online dating profile may influence far more than whether someone appears interesting. New research from Reichman University and the University of Rochester suggests that the amount of personal information people disclose can shape not only how attractive they seem, but also whether potential partners imagine pursuing a casual encounter or a serious relationship with them. The findings point to a psychological “Goldilocks principle” in digital dating: profiles may be most effective when they reveal enough to signal openness and effort, but not so much that they overwhelm readers or eliminate the curiosity that encourages further interaction.

The study was led by Prof. Gurit Birnbaum of the Baruch Ivcher School of Psychology at Reichman University, in collaboration with Yovel Refaeli and Kobi Zholtack of Reichman University and Prof. Harry Reis of the University of Rochester. The researchers examined self-disclosure, the process through which people communicate personal information, thoughts, feelings, preferences, and aspects of their identity. In ordinary face-to-face encounters, self-disclosure develops gradually through reciprocal conversation. Online dating profiles are different: they are largely static, one-sided presentations in which a handful of sentences may become the main evidence available for judging a stranger’s personality and intentions.

That difference makes digital self-presentation psychologically powerful. In a live interaction, a person who initially says little can become more expressive as trust develops, while tone of voice, facial expression, gestures, and immediate responses provide additional context. A dating profile removes much of that social information. Readers must interpret written statements without the normal cues that help them distinguish shyness from disinterest, confidence from self-promotion, or enthusiasm from oversharing. As a result, the quantity of information itself can become a signal. A nearly empty profile may suggest low effort, emotional guardedness, or limited motivation to form a meaningful connection. A detailed profile may communicate openness and investment, but it may also expose incompatibilities too quickly or leave little for a future conversation to uncover.

The researchers conducted three studies with participants who were not currently in romantic relationships. Across the studies, participants first created dating profiles of their own and then evaluated profiles containing different levels of self-disclosure. A low-disclosure profile, for example, included only the brief statement, “I’m totally worth a chat!” A moderate-disclosure profile provided information about personality characteristics, hobbies, and personal preferences, giving readers several concrete points of connection without presenting an exhaustive personal history. The researchers also assessed responses to profiles with greater levels of disclosure, allowing them to compare how increasing amounts of information affected impressions and relationship intentions.

Participants rated the perceived attractiveness of the people behind the profiles and judged whether those individuals appeared to be seeking casual or long-term relationships. They also reported what kind of relationship they themselves would want to pursue. In some experiments, participants wrote messages to profile owners and selected which people they would prefer to know better. Independent judges later evaluated those messages for signs of romantic interest and willingness to continue the interaction. This combination of self-report measures and behavioral indicators enabled the researchers to distinguish between simply finding a profile appealing and actually expressing an intention to initiate or deepen contact.

The overall pattern showed that greater self-disclosure generally produced more favorable impressions. People who revealed more about themselves were often perceived as making greater effort and as being more open to a serious relationship. Yet the effect was not unlimited. When the written self-description was the primary information available, moderate disclosure generated the strongest romantic interest. Individuals who disclosed very little were less likely to be viewed as promising long-term partners, while extensive disclosure did not always produce additional enthusiasm. The result suggests that online attraction does not increase in a simple linear fashion as more information is added. Instead, the relationship between disclosure and interest may depend on whether the information creates connection while preserving opportunities for discovery.

The researchers interpret this pattern through the Goldilocks principle. Too little information can make a profile seem impersonal, disengaged, or difficult to evaluate. Too much can create cognitive overload, make the presentation feel excessive, or expose differences that might otherwise have been explored later in a more flexible context. Moderate disclosure may provide the psychological ingredients needed for initial attraction: enough specificity to make the profile feel authentic, enough effort to suggest genuine interest, and enough openness to imply that a relationship could develop. At the same time, it leaves unanswered questions that can motivate a message or a conversation. Curiosity, in this account, is not a minor side effect of attraction but part of the mechanism that moves people from viewing a profile to seeking further contact.

An additional finding showed that the meaning of self-disclosure depends on the rest of the profile. When profile owners explicitly stated that they were looking for a casual relationship, greater self-disclosure made them appear more open to a serious relationship than a minimal profile did. Participants consequently showed greater interest in pursuing a long-term relationship with them. This indicates that people do not interpret personal information in isolation. Instead, they integrate the amount of disclosure with explicit statements about relationship goals. A profile that says “casual” may communicate one intention directly, but a thoughtful and revealing self-description can soften that message by suggesting emotional openness, investment, or a willingness to form a deeper connection.

The findings do not mean that every dating profile should follow one universal formula, or that self-disclosure can reliably manipulate another person’s intentions. The researchers emphasize that what works depends on the information already present, the relationship goal being communicated, and the reader’s interpretation. Personal details may be useful when they offer authentic clues about values, interests, and everyday life rather than functioning as an indiscriminate data dump. A profile designed to attract a committed partner may benefit from communicating warmth, effort, and availability while avoiding either extreme: an empty presentation that gives potential partners no basis for engagement, or an overly exhaustive account that attempts to resolve compatibility before a conversation has begun.

Prof. Birnbaum said that moderate disclosure may provide the best balance when the self-description is the main source of information, conveying openness and a willingness to connect without overwhelming the reader or eliminating curiosity. The study, published in Current Psychology, highlights that a dating profile is not merely an advertisement intended to attract attention. It is an early social interaction, and the amount of information it contains can influence how viewers infer personality, motivation, and relationship goals. The practical implication is strikingly simple: people may be more likely to invite meaningful connection when they share enough of themselves to feel real, while leaving space for two strangers to discover the rest together.

References:
Birnbaum, G. E., Refaeli, Y., Zholtack, K., & Reis, H. T. (2026). “Too much information or not enough? How self-disclosure in online dating profiles influences attraction and relationship intentions.” Current Psychology.